Hogwarts School of Withcraft and Wizardry

Welcome Abroad the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.Quills Away and Wands Out!
HomeHome  CalendarCalendar  FAQFAQ  SearchSearch  RegisterRegister  Log inLog in  Live DuelLive Duel  Live DuelLive Duel  Request Forum DuelRequest Forum Duel  

Share | 
 

 Computer Mango!

View previous topic View next topic Go down 
AuthorMessage
Professor Severus Snape
Head Master
Head Master
avatar

Slytherin
Badges :




Status Message : I am sorry Argentina......You failed Millions!!
Posts : 1864
House Points : 3053
Join date : 2010-01-14

Enrolled
Wizarding Power: 5

PostSubject: Computer Mango!   Sun Apr 18, 2010 7:56 am

Sometimes it becomes necessary to move your computer to a new location for whatever reason; installing/adding new hardware or just decided to move it for "easier access", for instance (note easier access in quotation marks).

Whatever your reason is, this handy guide may help you alleviate some of the stress that always arises in such occasions.

Keep in mind that this is a venture only to be undertaken by those who know what they're doing...and masochists.

1. Bone up on your cursing. You will need it later.

2. Pick a *good* spot to locate your computer. Don't be too picky; you will regret having started on this venture soon enough.

3. Disconnect all cables, cords, power sources, umbilical cords and plumbing. Look at the black, gray & white spaghetti mess on the floor and sob. Refer to number 1. While you're at it, it helps to focus on cursing Bill Gates and Steve Jobs for making all this possible.

4. Be sure to dust machine off, since it's been sitting for months in one spot, gathering a dust mound the size of Mt. Rainier. This is especially essential if you have asthma.

5. Now that you've picked a *good* spot, it's time to replace all the cables, cords, etc. Make sure it's in a dark, hard-to-reach location.

6. New computers have color-coded plugs and plugins to make assembly easier. This has no bearing on you since your computer is in a dark, hard-to-reach location and they're all the same color: gray. See number 1.

7. Get a flashlight. Look for new batteries for flashlight you've left in the junk drawer for months. Go to store to buy new flashlight batteries since you don't have any. Rule number 1 is coming in handy now.

8. While inserting various cords and cables, be sure to drop at least one on the floor behind the desk, where it will take a contortionist to retrieve it.

9. Find out that your printer cable is now not long enough to reach the computer (see number 1). Oh well, you didn't use it that much anyway.

10. Once you have all the cables, etc. back in place, turn computer back on.

11. Sit, puzzled why computer isn't working.

12. Plug monitor in.

13. Ponder why keyboard and mouse don't work.

14. Switch keyboard and mouse plugins.

15. Call spouse in to admire your handiwork.

16. Spouse informs you that he/she liked it better where it was, and to move it back.

17. When asked why you're banging your head on the monitor, don't reply. It would only confuse him/her



[center]
My Moderation Color[/center]
Back to top Go down
http://www.thedungeons.info
Lord Voldemort
Ist Year
Ist Year
avatar

Slytherin
Remarks : Unbanned because repentance is the Greatest Penance
Badges :

Hogsmeade Items : None

Posts : 188
House Points : 195
Join date : 2010-02-27

Enrolled
Wizarding Power: 5

PostSubject: Re: Computer Mango!   Sun Apr 18, 2010 9:53 am

Lame.
Back to top Go down
Professor Severus Snape
Head Master
Head Master
avatar

Slytherin
Badges :




Status Message : I am sorry Argentina......You failed Millions!!
Posts : 1864
House Points : 3053
Join date : 2010-01-14

Enrolled
Wizarding Power: 5

PostSubject: Re: Computer Mango!   Sun Apr 18, 2010 12:07 pm

Then I suggest you bring me, some better ones, Tom



[center]
My Moderation Color[/center]
Back to top Go down
http://www.thedungeons.info
Sponsored content




PostSubject: Re: Computer Mango!   

Back to top Go down
 
Computer Mango!
View previous topic View next topic Back to top 
Page 1 of 1
 Similar topics
-
» Mango Azalea
» Olido's Pet - Mango (Hell Raven)

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
Hogwarts School of Withcraft and Wizardry :: Hogwarts Grounds :: Muggle Suburb :: Fun, Humour and Jokes-
Jump to: